Swants

I am an angry knitter. This is a fact. I can't tolerate you breathing or blinking or even thinking about breathing or blinking if I am knitting. You will confuse me and I'll mix up knit and purl.

I can cut-and-sew the HECK out of a sweater, though. These Swants, I may have to try. Or at least I'll read the tutorial a few more times. It's hilarious.

See, that's the problem. While I don't knit, I do like to read the blogs of several knitters. Somehow, it's recreational for me.

Read and see the whole Swants tutorial (it's kind of a fashion movement!) right here. Be prepared to be inspired. It's very recreational.

Regretsy, when the usual handcrafted gift just won't do

One day last year a friend sent me a link to a site called Regretsy. I clicked on the link to see some vagina jewelry featured. Or maybe it was a chicken sweater or knitted tampon cozy. I don't remember, it is all a funny blur. The very funny Helen Killer (April Winchell) selected the very best of the worst on Etsy and featured the items on her site. Tampon earrings. Vampire wedding couples made out of clay flowerpots and glued-on pom-poms. She skewers the very oddest, the worst, the craziest in Indie Crafts on post after post. The site is not to be read at work, or with your children, or with anyone who has thin skin. The crafters that are skewered often sell their work fast to hipsters who purchase the oddities to hang ironically on their living room walls or (in the case of a few wearables) to don for their ironic wedding photos.

Before you think April Winchell is evil, she is a person who admits to loving the weird. She also admits to making wicked fun of people who forget to use spell-check, who make something in 5 minutes and want to sell it for $100 and to people who glue pipe-cleaners and plastic sequins on old cheese graters and call it Steampunk.

Now there is a Regretsy book. We got the book in and I browsed through it and laughed but I have to admit I didn't read it cover-to-cover. I did bring one home, because that is exactly the kind of book I want to have in my living room. One evening I was leafing through the book looking for design inspiration and I saw that a print that I have (unironically) hanging on the wall of my studio is featured in the book.

Now, exactly what is odd or humorous about a bowl of brussel sprouts and doll heads, I ask you?

You can get the book here. It is very funny and would be a great gift for your favorite etsian.

Size matters...measuring very small distances...and teeny-tiny pies

Because of what we do here everyday I pay a lot of attention to very small things. I can judge the size of a bead in the blink of an eye. I can tell you the gauge of wire with a glance. Somehow, though, sheet metal sometimes confuses me. And bezel wire? Oh, it always seems bigger than it is...That's why I have a gauge. Actually, I have a lot of them. I have this one (below) for that pesky sheet metal and bezel wire, as well as a ring gauge for finger-sizing and a ring mandrel for ring-sizing. I also have a dozen different measuring tapes for necks, wrists, ankles. Because I love measurements so much, I love this video featuring bees getting hit with teeny-tiny pies.

Um, I have to say though that this video is amazing even if you don't like measurements. Did I mention the teeny-tiny pies?